Self Portrait 2001 AD


                                        Him in me                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   

This is a painting which I did 10 years ago.  It represented at the time what I felt inside after my first marriage had broken down.   What was left in the hellish isolation.  I was tired and alive.  I had moved into a property with my two infant children who were almost 2 and 4 years old.  The property needed complete renovation.   My children needed a mummy.  Our lives needed renovating.   Even the builders didn’t want to snap it up, there were other more expensive properties on the market which would have been far easier and cheaper for them to renovate, which would have brought in a far bigger profit margin.  I had 3 choices, go back home to my parents house, apply for a council house or bed and breakfast with two small children, or renovate an old property which currently only had surface re-wiring, an outside cold tap to fill the bath, and only a tiny kitchen sink of an immersion. This I decided was to be the only viable option for us.

It turned out to be my Bethlehem, the stable in which we were given shelter during desperate times.  This is both the place where I came to live when I had lost all faith, and the place where I was led to faith.  Several years later I was to find out that this was the Sacred home that hosted Catholic Mass in its tiny front room, for up to twelve people. This home was the tabernacle of the Catholic Church in this town from 1902-1935.

The words on the painting say ‘I die a thousand times and am reborn a thousand times more’.  I made the canvas for the painting from my babies crib sheet.


About mags

Beloved apostle of His Soul x
This entry was posted in art, birth, death, female discipleship, prayer and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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