Agnostic days of my upbringing
Give way to emerging spirals of hope,
For I know so well, that in birth, in death, in Love, and in Truth
The veil is stretched so fine.
It is, as if it were pulled back to reveal
An ever patient, all encompassing, immortal Whole
Whose influence I live and ultimately die for.
In death, my Dad and I were blessed by Your Presence
And in return, and in reverse
As he had done me the honour in life
I gave away my father in death.
In Your patience almighty Father, You waited for me to be ready
I lay his hand in Your hand
And in Your gentleness, You gave me a privilege eternal.
I felt You touch my soul, I felt You hold my spirit.
In birth You came when I knew You would, at 27
An annunciation already proclaimed within the mind,
And it was years past since I was told.
I still tried, and failed to prematurely override.
Then after 4 babes, and counting blessings
As death was all so close,
I knew too, there was another child,
Against all the will of my marriage, I knew.
And though the veil was drawn thin
Through the portal I told You, this life, I was not ready to depart.
But You knew, for there were matters of the heart.
Love a Truth, only I cannot deny
Its deepness, by deeper deep does bless
Matters not in life or death
For Truth to which I have no veil
You lay bare my soul.
I Love, as You God have willed me to Love.
And in Your plan, despite my blindness
You place my Love, where You can see it is needed.
And in Your eternal plan
No matter what my will undoes
In patience, You do again and again.
It matters not, how hard I try to extinguish Your will
A candle lighting another candle
Looses nothing in its quest.
Until in Your perpetual light I rest.
Despite man putting rules between You and I
Upon Your will God
Pray I am forever blessed xxx